Fashion identity crisis

Posted on 04.05.2014


Hey there:)

I’ve been MIA, I know. I’ve just been so busy WORKING. Part of the plan for Japan was to work our asses off for the first 3 months, in order to get back on our feet and to be able to aggressively pay back the debt we’ve been incurring since the move. So that’s where I’ve been. And I’m still working from the boyfriend’s computer, as mine isn’t back yet. There’s that, as well.

Honestly, I’ve been away from Adobe products and haven’t had a lot of time to shoot (or any inclination, really) for so long, that I’m not sure what’s going to happen when I get my baby back. I hope they were able to at least keep my hard drive intact.

I’ve got a lot of posts to get through in the next few days, so be prepared for that. Today’s post is about a fashion issue I’m having lately.

So my sister and friend were able to pack up all of the clothes I wanted from Baltimore and ship them to me. The process took a while, but the clothes finally got here. There was only one very large problem: between the time I last wore the clothes (a few months ago or over the summer) until now, I’ve lost about 20 pounds. I wasn’t trying to, it just happened, it’s a bit of a side effect from the MS, and it seems NO amount of eating whatever the eff I want is getting me back to my happy weight. The diet change and excess of walking here might have something to do with it just staying off.

Because of this, from all of the clothes that were sent to me, about 20% fit. My work suit, my dress clothes, favourite jeans, all of them are now too big and sitting in a box in my guest room closet, waiting until I can wear them again.

And the clothes I’d brought with me were starting to get big, too, and then the seasons changed, and suddenly I had almost no clothes to wear.

So I decided to go shopping to buy more clothes.

Except my head nearly exploded when I went shopping, because it hadn’t occurred to me UNTIL then that for most of my adult and pre-adult life, I’ve been buying multifunctional business casual clothing, since all of my jobs have required some form of business casual wear. My daily style WAS business casual. My causal wear was lazy t-shirts around the house. That was about it.

And now I wear a suit to work. There is literally NO NEED for business casual anymore. I can wear whatever the eff I want on the weekends, and rest assured that come Tuesday, I will just throw on my suit and one of the many tops I’ve got to go with it.

Add to this the fact that Tokyo (or Japanese style, to the point) is MUCH more feminine than I am used to or prepared for. It’s all skirts and bows, or far too young to wear over here. So I’ve had to spend days off on literal recon missions, just ambling through stores and trying to figure out what in the hell I actually like. This is kind of difficult, since my Japanese sucks and a lot of stores really do like to sell one-size-fits-all. And that size is really too big, and I don’t want to hide in tons of folds of fabric. Especially not in the summer.

I’ve also been doing some SERIOUS people watching since I noticed I don’t know what I want. I’m getting some good ideas off of that, except that I can’t exactly ask the ladies I see where they got their clothes… Language barrier ftw.

unnamedI’m not even sure what my style is, if it’s not business casual. I bought two things so far, and one felt more like a band-aid.

<<<This is the other thing I bought, and as soon as I actually WEAR it, I will take photos. But it seems I may have a penchant for fabrics that could be used to upholster a couch.

Another issue I’m running into here is that there is just TOO MUCH CHOICE. You can get anything you want here for the right price, but on top of that, there isn’t just ONE shopping district, there are many. I happen to live near one, so that is awesome. But the completist in me wants to know where ALL of the shops are and what EACH of them sells before making too many purchases, for fear of not finding the best clothes or the best price. I am working to come to terms with the idea that this may never happen for me. Still, I’m trying. I walk into stores whenever I have the time. There are just too many of them.

So at the moment I am slowly rebuilding a wardrobe. I haven’t done this in a long time, and now that I don’t have to wear the clothes to work, I have to reset my thinking and figure out what I actually WANT to wear. Because those hot shoes from Irregular Choice I have aren’t going to work with just anything. Photos to come, I hope!

Posted in: fashion, Japan, life, shopping